Since its release, internet nerds (and I use that as a term of endearment, considering I’m fucking King Dork) have complained that Cloverfield was nothing more than a shaky-cammed cocktease. The fact that we never got a true reveal of the oh-so-mysterious monster was a real sticking point for a lot of people. Personally, I thought it added to the experience — these critics are the same people who complain that they never get any answers from LOST, all the while ignoring the fact that this type of entertainment is enjoyable because of the mystery, not in spite of it. It’s the means, not the end, people. It’s an inevitability that whatever answer is provided simply won’t live up to the image in your head. Which is why the above image is such a disappointment. What you’re seeing is the Cloverfield monster in $99, 70-points-of-articulation toy form. And it’s just not very cool looking. I would have been perfectly happy never knowing that it’s just some pasty, daddy long legs/praying mantis amalgam. But whatever, killjoys. There you have it. ROAR!